A little update
I haven't done updates for a while. Christmas has crept up on me and made me feel overwhelmed with a bunch of things that I'd like to share as they are building up on my chest.
I love Christmas and always have, December is my favourite month because my birthday celebrations happen too. Although this year I've been trying to keep busy and do a bunch of things that I've never been able to do while at work because of time and now I'm all prepared for what it looks like a "perfect Christmas" I feel a little bit down every day - there might be another reason for this that I'll explain in a moment - I'm definitely trying to snap out of it and be thankful for what I've got but there's a lot of times that I'm focusing on what I don't have. I'm thankful for having an amazing partner that is sticking with me through thick and thin, my mum that is always on the other side of the phone when she's not making all the efforts to be here by my side, my dad who just came to visit me after not seeing me for 4 years - old grudges got in the way, but peace is made with the past now - my whole family that are on the other side of the video chat, and M's family that are constantly worried about me. Friends are definitely who I miss most this time of the year. Unfortunately everyone is busy or in another country because that's what Christmas is all about: going home and see your family. Now this is where cancer wins a little bit. I won't be able to have my friends/family annual reunion that is now a tradition, and wrongly I feel slightly jealous of everyone that is able to do it and don't appreciate it fully. Don't get me wrong, I'll be spending Christmas surrounded by M's family and my mum and I'm very thankful for it - I just wanted a bit more, that bit more that I have every year that won't be able to have this year, that's all.
I just want you all to be thankful and appreciate the people that are near your this holiday season, don't waste your time with arguments, tell people you love them and swallow whatever pride you have and make contact with that person you haven't spoken to for years. Life is too short.
Now back to the update. Guess what is not pleasant and is back in my life? - Yes, you're right, my period!
I'm sorry for oversharing, but this made me happy for a day or two, and sharing is caring! I'm not happy about it anymore and it can go again - lol - Never thought it would come back this early. It was exactly two months after I finished my Zoladex injections. It's a good sign because it means that I'm not menopausal - yay - but I'm not sure about my fertility yet, will have to check this with the doctors. Basically I think all those feelings I'm having might have to do with my hormones being all over the place too, my body is getting used to "normality" again.
About my post surgery recovery, everything is going well, have been discharged from the physiotherapy and the range of movement is getting better every day, I push it a bit more everyday. The scar tissue under my arm and on my breast are crazy big - looks like I've got a lump similar to the tumour and every day when I touch it doing the cream massage - I panic just a little bit and then tell myself that is scar tissue and it should be fine. I'm letting myself start the radiotherapy and see if it changes and might contact someone at the hospital at the beginning of the year just in case.
Scars are doing well I just hope radiotherapy doesn't change them. This picture was taken in the morning before applying the cream - greasy hands and greasy skin are not photo friendly. I've noticed that the scars are needing 3x more cream than the body, but it's winter and skin dries more anyway. I've been using these two products on my scars, and so far I'm happy. I've got another two lined up for radiotherapy and I can see that will need to moisturise 5 times a day to avoid peeling skin.
Hair is growing - slow-fast - but I'm preparing another post about it.
P.x
I haven't done updates for a while. Christmas has crept up on me and made me feel overwhelmed with a bunch of things that I'd like to share as they are building up on my chest.
I love Christmas and always have, December is my favourite month because my birthday celebrations happen too. Although this year I've been trying to keep busy and do a bunch of things that I've never been able to do while at work because of time and now I'm all prepared for what it looks like a "perfect Christmas" I feel a little bit down every day - there might be another reason for this that I'll explain in a moment - I'm definitely trying to snap out of it and be thankful for what I've got but there's a lot of times that I'm focusing on what I don't have. I'm thankful for having an amazing partner that is sticking with me through thick and thin, my mum that is always on the other side of the phone when she's not making all the efforts to be here by my side, my dad who just came to visit me after not seeing me for 4 years - old grudges got in the way, but peace is made with the past now - my whole family that are on the other side of the video chat, and M's family that are constantly worried about me. Friends are definitely who I miss most this time of the year. Unfortunately everyone is busy or in another country because that's what Christmas is all about: going home and see your family. Now this is where cancer wins a little bit. I won't be able to have my friends/family annual reunion that is now a tradition, and wrongly I feel slightly jealous of everyone that is able to do it and don't appreciate it fully. Don't get me wrong, I'll be spending Christmas surrounded by M's family and my mum and I'm very thankful for it - I just wanted a bit more, that bit more that I have every year that won't be able to have this year, that's all.
I just want you all to be thankful and appreciate the people that are near your this holiday season, don't waste your time with arguments, tell people you love them and swallow whatever pride you have and make contact with that person you haven't spoken to for years. Life is too short.Now back to the update. Guess what is not pleasant and is back in my life? - Yes, you're right, my period!
I'm sorry for oversharing, but this made me happy for a day or two, and sharing is caring! I'm not happy about it anymore and it can go again - lol - Never thought it would come back this early. It was exactly two months after I finished my Zoladex injections. It's a good sign because it means that I'm not menopausal - yay - but I'm not sure about my fertility yet, will have to check this with the doctors. Basically I think all those feelings I'm having might have to do with my hormones being all over the place too, my body is getting used to "normality" again.
About my post surgery recovery, everything is going well, have been discharged from the physiotherapy and the range of movement is getting better every day, I push it a bit more everyday. The scar tissue under my arm and on my breast are crazy big - looks like I've got a lump similar to the tumour and every day when I touch it doing the cream massage - I panic just a little bit and then tell myself that is scar tissue and it should be fine. I'm letting myself start the radiotherapy and see if it changes and might contact someone at the hospital at the beginning of the year just in case.
Scars are doing well I just hope radiotherapy doesn't change them. This picture was taken in the morning before applying the cream - greasy hands and greasy skin are not photo friendly. I've noticed that the scars are needing 3x more cream than the body, but it's winter and skin dries more anyway. I've been using these two products on my scars, and so far I'm happy. I've got another two lined up for radiotherapy and I can see that will need to moisturise 5 times a day to avoid peeling skin.
Hair is growing - slow-fast - but I'm preparing another post about it.
"Be grateful when things are going your way, be graceful when they're not."
P.x
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