Guess what?
Five years ago I was a scary little mess flying to an unknown country, to live and work with strangers and embrace a whole new culture. Every year I get to this day and look back on what I have achieved so far in those conditions. Not everyone is strong enough to live family and friends behind, or 25 years of a "took for granted" life. - But I did, with not one single regret. - I could say it's been hard at times, that I cried so much at the beginning, that had been times that I would go back home every month because I couldn't stand the distance. However it's also been the time that I've accomplished my professional dreams and created a new family. Although all of that is true, it doesn't seem to be the main thing that pops up in my mind on the 6th of December.
I've got cancer... or I had it. According to the papers I've got with me, they say there's no evidence of disease but as this is not over yet, I still feel like something is still wrong inside.
It's December, my favourite time of the year, and I'm pooing my pants with the unknown. Radiotherapy will start soon and it will be 1 year that day that I haven't been "home". Remember when I said I used to go every month? Tough luck.
On the other hand, being in this country for five years made me create the roots I needed, made me meet extraordinary people build up my support system and my new family. So for some reason, I feel that all of this was meant to be. In this exact time, with these exact people I wouldn't be able to do it without. They for sure know who they are.
Ever wonder when someone enters your life how special they are going to be? Yeah me neither, but now I tend to pay more attention to who stays and who goes.
As many cons cancer might have, the biggest pro was making me aware of regrets and grudges. The way it changed my view of people and life in general. How it made me forgive and perhaps store the grudges in a little box on the back of my head.
So today I'd like to take a minute - just the one as I've got a busy day ahead - to reflect on how "lucky" I can consider myself for having the right ones around me.
If I could pass a message on today would be forgive your past. (She says as she's about to pick her dad up from the airport after years of barely no contact)
So now, 6th of December, you too have changed from a reflection on the immigration day to reflection on life day.
P.x
Five years ago I was a scary little mess flying to an unknown country, to live and work with strangers and embrace a whole new culture. Every year I get to this day and look back on what I have achieved so far in those conditions. Not everyone is strong enough to live family and friends behind, or 25 years of a "took for granted" life. - But I did, with not one single regret. - I could say it's been hard at times, that I cried so much at the beginning, that had been times that I would go back home every month because I couldn't stand the distance. However it's also been the time that I've accomplished my professional dreams and created a new family. Although all of that is true, it doesn't seem to be the main thing that pops up in my mind on the 6th of December.
I've got cancer... or I had it. According to the papers I've got with me, they say there's no evidence of disease but as this is not over yet, I still feel like something is still wrong inside.
It's December, my favourite time of the year, and I'm pooing my pants with the unknown. Radiotherapy will start soon and it will be 1 year that day that I haven't been "home". Remember when I said I used to go every month? Tough luck.
On the other hand, being in this country for five years made me create the roots I needed, made me meet extraordinary people build up my support system and my new family. So for some reason, I feel that all of this was meant to be. In this exact time, with these exact people I wouldn't be able to do it without. They for sure know who they are.
Ever wonder when someone enters your life how special they are going to be? Yeah me neither, but now I tend to pay more attention to who stays and who goes.
As many cons cancer might have, the biggest pro was making me aware of regrets and grudges. The way it changed my view of people and life in general. How it made me forgive and perhaps store the grudges in a little box on the back of my head.
So today I'd like to take a minute - just the one as I've got a busy day ahead - to reflect on how "lucky" I can consider myself for having the right ones around me.
If I could pass a message on today would be forgive your past. (She says as she's about to pick her dad up from the airport after years of barely no contact)
So now, 6th of December, you too have changed from a reflection on the immigration day to reflection on life day.
P.x
No comments:
Post a Comment