I feel healthy.
How can such a small thing be so deadly.
How can I believe that I'm ill if I don't feel anything?
Today I felt normal, M and I went fishing. Was a normal day, I had a normal appetite, fed the fishes, even cast a rod (o.m.g. that's well exciting!) and was able to enjoy the beautiful nature around us. The silence and the peace was well needed.
After a while conversation always goes to the same subject: The C word. But, for a change, we faced it with positives words. I wanted to concentrate in the beautiful things that surround us and how tiny we are in this immense world. Every creature is fantastic in it's own way.
This (shit face - as M's mum calls it) has changed us already. We're more mature, we're facing things differently, we're making peace with the past. Past conflicts are easily forgiven because this is way bigger than that. Way bigger than any argument or small row.
Please learn to forgive the past behind you and the people in it. I certainly did.
The C word came to stay and to teach us a lot.
Today I struggled to say "I've got Breast Cancer". Perhaps tomorrow will be different and I know at some point I'll stop being angry at it and embrace it as it's always going to be a small part of me - Even if it will be just in a memory
"For whatever we lose (like a you or a me), it's always ourselves we find in the sea."
P.x
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